So there I was, mindin' my own...

When I left the gym this morning on my way to appraise a house in La Porte, I was aaaaall worried about being all sweaty and in my gym clothes while working, but I thought, "Eh, the house is vacant. I won't see anyone." Come to find out, that was the least of my worries this morning.

I drove up to a new-ish house in a neighborhood made up of mostly older homes, like 50 or 60 years old. I parked on the street, and noticed a tubby fella yelling on his cell phone across the street. I was like, that guy needs to SIMMER DOWN. But I went ahead and started measuring the house. I didn't even get finished with the front wall of the house, when I hear ol' Tubby yell out at full capacity, "HEY, JOE!" then BOOM! a gun shot. I turned around to Tubb's direction and saw him holding a shotgun pointed down the street, towards a construction crew working on a house adjacent to my house. All I was thinking was, "seriously? did that just happen?" and I couldn't stop staring at Tubbs McGee. So he saw me watching him with that gun in his hand and went back inside. Then I started running over to the construction crew and they said, "Did you hear that?" and I said, "pssh-yeah, it was a GUN." "Was he shooting at y'all or what?" They said, "You saw it?" and I said, "yeah, it was like a rifle or shotgun or something, I don't know the difference." One guy said, it sounded like a rifle to me." Then they said that he had been arguing all morning and cussing up a storm with someone else. So I'm standing behind Dave's truck parked on the road, and the crew is calling the police. Then we're trying to see if Tubby is still around and we see that he's watching us through his door window. So we're all out in the street, not knowing what to do, hearts beating a mile a minute, and the Tubbster comes out again and is yelling at us "F*** you! F***you! F***you! I see you! I know what you're doing!!..." So then I'm really scared and I crouch down behind the truck and so do the guys in the crew.

I called Dave and whispered to him the address I was located at in case something happened to me and called my boss because he knew the address too.

When the police finally showed up (all 8 cars and 1 motorcycle), they listened to what I had to say and said to stay out of the line of fire, but I can't leave because I'm the only witness. Great. The shooter had locked himself in his house and wasn't coming out. The cops were hiding behind trees directly across from me. A few minutes later, they yelled for me to hide somewhere further away in case Tubby had a scope. I channeled my inner-marine and ducked-and-ran over to a random garage and sat in there for a while. We waited and waited and then I found out they were waiting for the SWAT team to get there so they could go in and apprehend Tubbs. Then I was like, doh!! why am I not taking pictures?! No one is going to believe me if I don't have pics!!

I peeked around outside the garage to photograph my vantage point

They had the house completely surrounded and every exit covered. They ushered him out finally in cuffs, and all the police were pointing their guns at him the whole time. Then they went in to search the house and they found his shotgun, which they made me identify as well as the shooter.

CA-RAY-ZAY!!!!

Turns out, the guy said that he shot the gun in the air (because, you know, THAT makes it better). And JOE! is a neighbor. So that's how they roll in La Porte with neighborly disputes...

Then I had to finish measuring the house and get back to my hungry babies!

Bringing out Tubby from the house. Notice gun pointed at him by policia on corner.

Tubby's against a wall. The guy in jeans has a massive gun. From what I could tell, that one guy is the SWAT team. Pretty disappointing.


This view still doesn't show all the officers and police cars, but it's a lot of the crowd


Bullet-proof vested guys. Tubbs still hangin' on the wall.


I was too late to get the full photo, but this guy is putting the shotgun in the car. You can only see the end of it...looks like it's coming out of his waist.

I'm breaking up with my job...

I'm pretty sure that this blog will slow down to a snail's pace (as if it hasn't already) due to the fact that I'm on bedrest, awaiting the arrival of my twin baby girls. Hence, no work, no photos, no crazy sightings while out and about.

So few people know about this blog, and those that do most likely know that I HAVE been blogging regularly on a little site created by my husband Dave and I, documenting our pregnancy related world these days. www.theheadleyfamily.com if you're interested.

So long, farewell.....for now!!

I thought I had seen it all...

I've appraised literally THOUSANDS of houses in the past 6 1/2 years and I seriously thought I had seen it ALL. Especially when appraising foreclosures. The really bad ones. Where people are really, really mad that THEY didn't make their payments for months and now they have to leave. I've seen houses that almost look like they're under construction because every single inch of sheetrock has been busted. I've experienced navigating through houses filled and smeared with dog crap (very strategic, Guy that managed to defile every door knob and faucet handle with feces...you got me, that time!). Houses graffiti-ed to the hilt, used drug needles, used condoms, used pads, used tampons, missing toilets, entire missing kitchens, you name it, you can't faze me!!!

But today, I DIED laughing when I saw this:

I walked into the master bathroom and saw all this grey dust and I knew it was going to be good. Then I see the bathtub. It looked liquid, and with all the chunks I thought, "Ahhhh, the old Dump-In-The-Tub, trick...good one". But as I tried to move one of the two GOLF CLUBS, I got a "Boioioioioing!!!!!". It was concrete. In a tub. With two golf clubs. So the grey dust was Ready Mix. They just poured that bag out and let the water run!! Maybe the golf clubs were make-shift stirrers?

I ran out of the house to try to flag down the nosy neighbor that cornered me minutes earlier, getting the scoop on the house. I couldn't NOT share this one! Alas, he was nowhere to be found.

Mom added an interesting twist when she said, "maybe it's art?". Doubtful. If it is art, then I think we all know what the title is.

I only wish I knew how much it was going to cost to replace the plumbing system, as I'm sure loooots of concrete went down the pipes to the public sewer system.

Nice job. (golf claps)

Lucky Day

This is one of those times where you have to make the finger sign for "three" with both hands, and place them on either side of your open mouth to spell "WOW". Wow. I ran across this on "my lucky day" (obvious). In case the photo isn't clear enough, it's a pimped out mobile home outfitted to resemble the space shuttle. THE SPACE SHUTTLE. Mobile home. Have you EVER thought those two should ever be uttered in the same sentence? Neither has anyone else besides This Guy.

To round out the luckiest day ever, I just about shat my pantalones when, next door, I peeped this:

and I'm not joking. I thought to myself, "where there goes the neighborhood". Then I thought, man, these people are really proud since they TITLED their residence. But I got home and googled "The Orange Show" and discovered it's a folk art museum(?) of sorts. I guess I'm the last to know, and obviously lacking in my Houston culture knowledge.

I wish it wasn't a well patronized destination. I was much more enjoying the thought of imagining what kind of eccentric person could live in a place like that.

And have Mr. Space-Super-Fan as a neighbor.

THIS is "tidy"

It's like when you see a great mountatintop view, and even if you have a panoramic camera, you can never capture what it really feels like to actually be there...such is the case with this lady's house. It's not possible for you to accurately imagine JUST HOW MUCH CRAP was in every. single. inch. of this house. When I told Miss McCountryClutter that I would be needing interior photos, she replied, "oh good, i'm glad I cleaned up." And she was serious.

Smoke Much?

Now, I have come across the "smoke stained wall" scene seeeeveral times, but NEVER have I also been fortunate enough to witness the "smoke stained carpet" portion as well. If pictures can invoke other senses, such as smell, you should be alternately gagging-slash-choking right about now.

You're welcome. And yes, it was THAT disgusting. Visually and Olfactorily.

Peace out...I'm gonna shove Renuzit adjustable cone air fresheners in both of my nostrils.

I call this one "Point Taken"

If a picture tells a million words, is there really anything I can add? I think not. 100% self-explanitory.

In case you didn't grow up in the hood:
http://www.snopes.com/crime/gangs/sneakers.asp

Update: To answer Crystal's question, this masterpiece is located off of 59 North at Little York. This is the same area that I found myself about 4 or 5 years ago, at a red light near the Fiesta grocery store, where I almost ran over about 6 guys that darted in front of me. About 2 seconds later, I was swarmed by approximately 14 HPD police cars from the rear (heh hehe, i said rear). THEN, the policia caught up to the boys under the bridge across from the grocery store and I thought I was going to witness a Rodney King-ing. So I pulled into the Fiesta parking lot and watched for a while, like the good gossip monger that I am. Being out-and-about in the right part of town is pure entertainment (as long as your windows are locked and your pepper spray is handy!)