Ghetto

Nothing spells G-H-E-T-T-O like throwing your 14 year old daughter in to a slutty "Miss Santa" costume and pimping her out on the street to sell M&M's.....in November. Seriously. I do not lie.

You just don't eff with a guy's car

Does this sight not make you suck in the entire room's worth of air in horror? The first cardinal sin SHOULD have been...thou shalt not eff with people's cars.

Awww yeah!

So I'm a real estate appraiser by profession and i come across A LOT of crazy stuff. I swear i should write a book to recount all of my best (and worst) stories. But i hate to write, so here's the start of my condensed versions in the form of this blog.

I took the photo above a few months ago inside a single lady's house. This was her guest bedroom. She had this monstrosity CUSTOM MADE for her over 25 years ago and just can't seem to get rid of it. Not only is the entire "thing" made of crushed red velvet, it boasts a built-in stereo (and 8-track!) system with speakers in the "headboard". Someone must have taken the term "headboard" to heart considering that it's shaped like a helmet. From the angle of the photo, you can't tell that the helmet shaped element covers the first 1/3 of the bed, but it does. Also note the space for a blacklight under the stereo. The piece de resistance, however, is the little side table where you can rest your matching red phone and/or your bottle of courvossier for you and your lady! Please don't forget to take in the lovely black lace curtains that so perfectly complete the look and feel of the room. If you are interested in purchasing this gem, i know a lady that's willing to sell!!

Separated by Strawberry Shortcake

This is my all-time favorite photo of Brandon. When I see it, I double over in convulsions from laughing so hard my side hurts! I've always said that he looks just like the villan on the Strawberry Shortcake cartoons. I had to prove my point.